There is Actually Only One Way to Express True Love – Mental Health Research

What is the purpose of life? The only purpose that makes rational sense is to express love to all living entities. All other purposes are bound to be selfish, with a “getting” motive attached. The experience of true love seems to happen rarely on our planet, as indicated by the negative conditions of people and situations worldwide. The quality of our well-being and mental health depends on our willingness to express love to the life around us.

Many may be shocked to discover that true love is not a personal resource. I have no love of my own, nor do you, or anyone else. There is only one way we can express true love to the life around us, that is by consistently acting on what is truly right.

Here is another shocker; to act rightly a person cannot be acting selfishly. That means that he or she cannot be acting from a selfish or self-seeking intention. It means that a person cannot be in a selfish controlling or manipulative mode, and cannot be acting to get something for self.

The expression of true love requires that our intentions be pure; that we be sincerely will to give with no strings attached. We must also be willing to act in lovingly responsible ways, which includes being willing to express truth as we know it in appropriate ways. In a selfish environment, the expression of truth can sometimes be dangerous so discretion is in order.

At the heart of the process of expressing true love is a sincere willingness to express love. Without that willingness, whatever comes forth shall be some form of selfish action.

Here is an analogy:

Think of a human being as a “garden hose,” and his or her will as the “faucet” attached to the side of a house. The “water” is love.

In order for us to experience or express love, we must open our personal “faucet” (will) and be willing to allow water to flow (express love). When we are willing to express love, “water” flows through us and we feel good (we experience love). In addition, those around us get “wet” (are loved).

On the other hand, when we selfishly and defiantly refuse to express love, we keep our personal “faucet” shut so that no “water” can flow through us. Like an unused garden hose left out in the sun, it soon dries out and begins to decay.

The expression of love is vital to every person’s well-being. []

Neil Mastellone, working with his co-researcher Jean Mastellone, has been actively investigating the causes of negative human behavior.

Men’s Mental Health Issues

Since it is often hard for a man to share his feelings, it is important to find a therapist that you are comfortable sharing with. If you feel comfortable by the end of the first session, then you are with the right therapist. If you are not comfortable, it is okay to shop for another one.

Many men mask their vulnerable feelings with anger. Men have been taught to be tough and protective of others. Consequentially, if you feel sad, scared, or your feelings are hurt you cover it with anger. Many men believe that it is unmanly or weak to cry, look scared, or care what others think, so they express anger instead. It is healthy to be objective and ask yourself what you are really feeling. Your therapist can help with this.

Men have friends who they play sports, fish, or hunt with but would not talk to about their concerns. It is important to have at least one or two friends whom you can share your personal concerns with. This could include concerns about work, your family, your kids, your ambitions. Ideally, you could have at least one male friend and one female friend. This could include family members and your spouse.

When men get upset, what’s the first thing they do besides yell? You may go out and run, tinker with the car, or pack the fishing gear. Often you do not want to talk immediately. It is okay to do an activity first as long as you then talk to a trusted person.

If you are asked what’s wrong as soon as you get upset you may not want to talk immediately. However, keep in mind that the person only wants to help. A good compromise would be to politely tell them that you don’t want to talk now but you will talk later. This works as long as you really do approach them later and share.

You rarely if ever see one man approaching another and saying “You hurt my feelings.” We just don’t express ourselves that way. There are ways to express yourself without feeling embarrassed about your vulnerability. In men’s groups, when the members get comfortable, they begin to trust each other.

There are many men who still think that they are supposed to handle everything and any expression of vulnerability is an assault on their manhood. It makes more sense to believe that part of being a man is to have your full range of feelings and express them comfortably. You are not weak just because you express your feelings.

Men can benefit from therapy when they have the right attitude and keep an open mind about it. If you follow the leads from this article, it can help you get the help that you need and maximize your use of therapy.